Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Goodbyes and Transitions

Granny and Levi on April 27, 2008

4/27/08 Josiah, Granny, Levi, and Caleb

I thought goodbyes would be easier this time around, but they weren't. When we moved to California, Kerry and Bailey had already been there for three weeks. Caleb was five years old and Josiah was six weeks old. I already had a wonderful pediatrician that I knew I could trust, and I didn't need to find myself a doctor for awhile. I remember saying goodbye to my Mom before she left for school on a Wednesday morning feeling that it was worse than leaving for college. My dad took us to the airport which was tough but not as tough as it could have been since RyAnn and Brock were coming with us. I remember meeting Kerry at the airport and he looked like a Californian (if that's a word). Kerry took us to the house we had bought that I had only seen through pictures, took us to pick up some dinner, dropped us off at the house again, and then went back to church for an evening meeting. Had my sister not been there, I'm sure I would have broken down in tears. My sister was great helping unpack all of the boxes. We tried to squeeze in a little fun as well. A short week later, I said goodbye to RyAnn and Brock and tried not to cry as I was walking out of the airport with my two kids all alone. I have to admit I felt really alone that day. Obviously, things got better. I made friends, can truly say I like California, and have some wonderful memories to carry with us.

4/24/08 Caleb and Granddad

4/26/08 Caleb and Nana

When we moved out of our house in California in December, I truly felt that we would be back. As much as I would have like to have settled in Texas, I was content with going back to California. Part way through the past 6 months, we considered settling in the DFW area. It was exciting to think that we were finally going to be "home." I always assumed that if God moved us from California that he would lead us back to somewhere in Texas. Never did I imagine, he would move us just as far away from "home" in the opposite direction. One thing I have realized though, God gave us these past six months to prepare our family for this next journey in our lives. If Kerry had told me that he felt God was leading us to Florida while we were still in California, I'm not too sure I would have wanted to consider moving. Funny to think that I would have been fine with anything on the west coast. Having this time showed me that God was in control of our lives and that I didn't need to set parameters around where we lived. I have to admit, that I have been pretty scared to say that I would move anywhere in the world for fear of where He might lead us. I know I shouldn't feel this way, so I have something I need to work on.
4/26/08 Levi with his favorite person - Granddad

This move has felt harder to me at this point than the last. I cried as I hugged my parents goodbye in their yard. I was sad that I wouldn't see my sister and her family for awhile and that our boys once again would not see each other on a regular basis. It wasn't any easier saying goodbye to Granny knowing we wouldn't be nearby to see her. We have also moved to Florida with no house and our things are still in storage in California. We think we've found a house but I don't want to get overly excited about it until it's all said and done. We have three kids now with a fourth on the way. I still have not found a midwife (I am trying) and I'm looking for a pediatrician that will space out vaccines. It makes me tired thinking about it. And my dearest friend Jessica is all the way in California. Did I mention last week was so hot and humid I could hardly breath in the afternoons if we stepped outside?

4/26/08 Levi and Nana

I know I should look at the positives and I'll try. I'm thankful that a member in our church is letting us stay in one of his villas until we find a house. I'm thankful that we have a pastor with a prayerful heart. I'm thankful that Caleb loved Bible Study Saturday night and is constantly telling me that I have to get him there earlier next week. I'm thankful that my boys are all healthy now as Kerry will be out of town for four days starting on Friday. I'm very thankful that my Dad called me this morning to let me know he booked a flight and will be here on June 3 to see us. I'm thankful that I'm having a healthy pregnancy so far. And I'm thankful that we're all together, Bailey included.

4/26/08 Josiah (who didn't want his picture taken) and Nana

4/26/08 Josiah and Granddad


Marla Saunders said...

Hey Stephanie,
Thanks for sharing the pictures of your family!
I know that the transition is rough on you. It doesn't help that you came at the hottest time of year!!!
I'm sending you an email with a name of someone to call who may be able to help you with the midwife thing.
Hang in there!

Marla Saunders said...

OK...never mind, can't find an email. So call Kim Butler from Palm Beach Nutrition. She goes to Christ Fellowship and she and her husband work for us. She has her finger on all the wholistic scene around here. If she can't tell you a name, she will know who can. The number is 561-689-1070. Tell her I sent you!

Also, I was just looking at your profile. I'm totally into Christian Fiction, too. If you want to borrow any of my books, please feel free! I'm kind of a book-a-holic.

The O'Connell Clan said...

Ok well I was doing good reading this post, praying for you as I was reading...showing the kids the pics, and then I lost it right at the word "Jessica"...I miss you so much but know God has us all right where he wants us! I am so thankful to God every day that he brought you to California! My life is forever changed by having you and your family a part of it! I have to think that God has a sense of humor that he would take my dearest friend and move her to Florida! I am so proud of you for trying to focus on the positives. Your family means so much to you and I just love the time you were able to spend with them these past few months! Praying!

RyAnn said...

We miss Aunt Stephy.
We miss Uncle Kerry.
We miss Caleb.
We miss Josiah.
We miss Levi.
We miss watching Silas growing in your belly.
We even miss Bailey.

Brock asks everyday (and I am not kidding) if today is Sea World with his cousins.

I miss you more than you know! We loved being able to hang out with you guys on a regular basis. Hang in there. I know God has lots planned for you guys!

Some positives:
1. I can now talk to you in the mornings because of your time new time zone.
2. I love to see the excitement on the kids faces when they see each other for the first time in a long time, it's priceless!
3. You will probally think it is "cool" in Texas when you visit next instead of thinking it is SO hot.
4. Your kids are by the beach again! That is super cool!
5. You live in a great vacation spot for us to come visit!

Brock is currently making you a map. He says it is so you know how to come to Sea World o surprise him! He says he will put the sea world animals on it for you. I need your address.

Love you!

Colorado Dreamin' said...

Thanks for sharing your feelings on the transitions that you have had to go through. It is an encouragement to me as I know God has that planned for us down the road when we move to CO. Even though we are ready to go there will be some hard goodbyes.