Saturday, January 01, 2011

Thankful and Sad



Tonight my Papa passed away only a few short hours after I saw him.

The boys and I arrived in Texas on Friday, December 17th. On Monday, December 20, my mom received a phone call saying that my Papa (her dad) had fallen and broken his hip. My mom left that afternoon to go be with him in Arkansas. We stayed in Texas and did all the fun things Nana had planned for us with Granddad. Papa had surgery the following day and my mom came home on Wednesday, the 22nd.

It was not in my plans to go to Arkansas but after his fall, I realized I needed to make a trip to see him before heading back to California. Kerry stayed in East Texas with is mom while my mom, the boys and I went to Arkansas to visit Papa. He had been moved to a rehab center for recovery. (He remarried after his first wife died and has been married for about 14 years. He moved to Arkansas from Fort Worth after he got married). We arrived yesterday before dinner and spent about an hour visiting with him. Then, he was tired and ready for bed. My mom and I took the boys to the hotel to swim.

This morning, my mom went early to be with Papa while the boys and I stayed at the hotel until check out. Then, the boys and I went back to visit him for a little bit before lunch. He and Caleb played cards and we talked about memories from long ago. He tired quickly, so we went to lunch. We came back and visited with him a little longer until he could no longer stay awake. It was a sweet yet sad goodbye knowing I might never see him again this side of Heaven. I told my mom that if she wanted to stay Kerry could come get her in a few days but we all came back.

We had just arrived back at my parents house and unloaded the car when my mom received the phone call that my Papa had passed away. I sit here with mixed emotions. First, I am thankful that he is no longer in pain and is in the presence of Christ. I am thankful that I made the decision to take the boys to Arkansas to see him. I'm thankful that he knew who we were and that we were able to tell him he is loved. I am thankful to Loriece and her children (who are grown) for loving Papa and taking care of him. I'm sad that I didn't get to spend more time with him or get to know him better now that I'm an adult. I'm sad that my mom no longer has her Dad here on earth. I'm sad when I see my 5 year old crying that Papa has died. I'm sad that we weren't there to hold his hand when he died. I'm upset that I didn't have the opportunity to take care of him. He will be missed. We love you, Papa!

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